How do you know, for sure, that you are over your ex and ready to start dating again?
Here are two quizzes to assist: “Are You Over Your Ex?”
http://www.quibblo.com/quiz/a2pPr4T/Are-you-OVER-your-EX
and “Are You Ready To Date Again?”:
Now that we have the silly fun out of the way — if you took these polls, you are probably struggling with this issue, or perhaps have the satisfaction of having recently succeeded with getting over an ex.
Everyone is different. I have friends who can’t get over their ex, no matter how hard they try. That means that you need some professional counseling. No hurt is meant to last forever. You would not allow a cold or flu to go on forever. The same is true for a hurt in your heart. If you can’t get over it, admit it and get some professional help. You need to love yourself well enough to do that.
When you are hurting, the best “home remedies” that I have seen for helping the hurt involve one or more of the following:
Taking CONTROL of the things you can take control of:
- Taking REALLY good care of yourself with a strict health/weight loss/nutrition kick
- Plunge into WORK and do really, really well — taste the success of making things happen
Getting positive ATTENTION from the opposite sex:
- going out on a date (but no farther than that if you are a woman — you know what I mean)
- flirt
- write your new online dating profile
Find things that give you COMFORT:
- talking it out with one true friend (please do not burden your co-workers!) Repeat as often as necessary
- eat your favorite treat (ice cream, chocolate, etc.)
- journaling
If you can’t cure the hurt, find a DISTRACTION until times heals the wounds:
- plunge into WORK
- go out with your friends
- take up a hobby or other past-time/distraction
- shopping
Take steps to BUILD YOUR BEST LIFE:
- Exercise — endorphins are natural mood lifters
- create a dream board and make plans about how to achieve these dreams
- read self help books
- beauty pick me ups — get nails done, hair cut, new shirt, shoes, etc.
The key is that just like medicine, many of these home remedies should not be taken FOREVER. If you eat too much chocolate, it’s not healthy/good for you — but a little is just fine. If one medicine is not your cup of tea, try another one. Too much of any medicine is never good.
Some people think of hurtful/revengeful ways to “feel better” about getting over their ex. Revenge is NEVER, EVER a good idea. It diminishes you, and it solidifies your image as a dysfunctional person in the eyes of your friends, and in the eyes of your ex. Don’t do it. Take the high road. Believe me when I say, you will feel MUCH better when you look back over your shoulder and see that you have done the right thing.
In the end, what everyone has doubtless told you already, the best revenge is living well. Create your own best life, and live it. Everyone — including your ex, will notice. And you will stop noticing anything about your ex because your own life will be so exciting, fulfilling and fun.
I’m curious as to what you think. How do you know you’re over your ex? What ideas can you share with the rest of us to help get over someone?